Recently I made a social media snafu, I guess I haven’t been on my “A” game as of late, and I posted a pic of me on a site with the following caption: “I want something special – a great connection.” An unintended cryptic message that caught the fancy of naysayers’ responses exclaiming that I wasn’t shit as a man looking for a relationship because I couldn’t even provide a more detailed response than what I did. So I edited the caption with a bit more detail that answered the original post’s question, “Men—Post A Pic And Be Specific About What Kind Of Relationship You Want.”

My lazy and unthoughtful ass couldn’t even muster up the creativity to provide more of a snapshot to my inner soul’s desire on the type of mate I would want and the type of man I would be if said mate would have me. No, I was a degenerate type of dude that didn’t think about anyone else but himself, so clearly I would drag a willing female through my mud and darkness while never providing a clear indication that the relationship (or supposed relationship) was on a road to nowhere.

Silly me to think otherwise. My fraudulent actions could not disguise my inner dog tendencies with this crowd of insightful women, so many let me have it. But, unlike Florida’s “Stand Your Ground” law and for me to state with bravado – I SAID WHAT I SAID! – I acquiesced to the pitchfork crowd and provided more fodder for the post.

It was received with a mix bag. 🥹

Don’t get me wrong, there were many people that had an understanding of where my thoughts were headed and they didn’t see me in the shrouded light of confusion and as a wolf in sheep’s clothing, but that I might have been genuine in my thoughts. And I was.

However, there is nothing wrong for me to self-assess, look in Michael Jackson’s metaphorical mirror, and start with what kind of man/mate I want to be and announce it to the world. In our current social climate, it is so much easier to stand your ground and believe everyone else is evil while you are the saint or good Christian you envision, wearing the mask of righteousness without truly considering the implications of such a stance. But it is so much harder to reflect on who you are, warts and all, and deal with them head-on, facing uncomfortable truths that may lurk just beneath the surface. It’s not that everyone has to like you or even hang out with you; however, cultivating a genuine understanding of oneself can lead to more meaningful connections and interactions with others. At the core of this self-discovery is the essential notion of authenticity—letting the world see your vulnerabilities and strengths alike. Accepting oneself fully paves the way for others to see your light, allowing them to accept you for who you truly are, which can foster deeper relationships based on mutual respect and understanding. Embracing this journey is ultimately a testament to personal growth, enabling both yourself and those around you to flourish.

I usually don’t put myself out there like that on the socials in effort to avoid the criticism I might receive. But, in this case, I was truly genuine in my thoughts on how I desire a connection so strong that all of my worldly desires of the flesh are merely secondary to the unexplainable metaphysical connection that I have witnessed in other relationships. The attraction, vibe, connection, or soulmativness (yes, I just invented this word) of another individual can be so deep that the mere presence of that individual lights you up like a cannon. It can be a beautiful thing in any kind of relationship – with my family, kids, friends – and even a mate. For that I might stand my ground and say, I said what I said – with the caveat – because I believe in something special.

Go well and with love good peeps.